Whenever she gets a chance, Ljubica Handjal lauds her late husband. She will not go so far as to claim that their marriage was an ideal one, but she still likes to paint it in the best of lights. There are a few of us around the table at Tomica’s when the subject of talking to husbands or wives comes up. Ljubica cannot believe that some people can go for quite a while—days, weeks, months, or even years—without opening their hearts to their spouses. “This,” she raises her hands with emotion, “I could not stand for more than half-an-hour.” She pauses and looks around the hushed table almost belligerently. “Why,” she drives her point home with a raised voice and a pointed finger, “I would end up talking out of my elbow!”