I have few secrets, but they attract most attention. Who cares about my many and stunning revelations? One of the few attractions is the identity of my beloved.

Addendum I (August 11, 2015)

My beloved remains one of the greatest attractions of my writings to this day. How can I be so sure about such a fickle subject? An occasional visit to Google Analytics gives me the full list of all the search words or phrases used by the visitors to my Residua website. As it happens, “my beloved” is a phrase that pops up pretty regularly. Which is why I cannot but keep the identity of my beloved a closely guarded secret for as long as I possibly can. For what is a website without snooping visitors?

Addendum II (January 12, 2018)

I am quite delighted to come across this piece and the first addendum. To this day, my beloved’s name remains a secret. Top secret, as a matter of fact. We have been together for no less than a couple of decades already, but that is a mere blink in the fullness of time. And I am doing my best not to divulge any connection between the two of us. All the revealing dates are shunned. The same holds for all the revealing places, as well. One way or another, I make sure that her identity is kept watertight. How much longer will this ruse of mine hold water, though? It is anyone’s guess, but I will keep doing my utmost for as long as I can. By now, the game has become sort of engaging to me. Fooling the fools, as it were. And there are fools galore on this poor planet of ours. All they are concerned about are trivialities of life. Who fucked whom, that is, and even worse.

Addendum III (January 26, 2019)

Well, well. Why is my beloved’s name such a secret after more than twenty years together? A good question, this. And the answer is quite stunning, I reckon. To wit, she does not want anyone around her to know that we are a man and woman, as it were. Although everybody in Motovun is privy to the secret, Zagreb is a different place. There, she makes sure that we can never be spotted holding hands, hugging, or kissing in public. God forbid! As time goes by, she is ever more reluctant to be seen with me even in Motovun, of all places. The Croatian capital is just behind the corner, anyway.

My beloved got married soon after we got together, and she is officially married still. She and her husband share the same employer, too. She left him shortly after their wedding, but neither of them would say a word about it to their colleagues and friends. Their families know nothing about it, either. My beloved and her husband have kept mum about it for nearly two decades by now. Amazingly, I have also been living a secret life all this time! Not a peep. Not a blink, either.

What is surprising about all this is that my beloved is jealous to boot. In fact, she is possessive. Not a single transgression is allowed to me, and all my supposed transgressions that come to the fore are punished with venom. At the same time, I am forced to live a double life of sorts. And I am not allowed to complain about it in any way imaginable. To wit, I am lucky to enjoy all the benefits of a life together without mentioning it to anyone I know. Who knows, they might be close to my beloved’s employer. God forbid, indeed! Life goes on and on, and I do my best not to mention my predicament. Who says death is a punishment? Cut out his lying tongue!