Croatia is a country bereft of news. Nearly everything is out in the open, but there are still no news. If I glance at the leading newspapers, all of which are pitiable or worse, I am looking only for the jumbo lettering on the front page. The former prime minister found dead in his cell? The current prime minister under arrest? The government ousted? The Croatian capital bankrupt? Well, not even the jumbo lettering of this ilk would be news at this miserable stage. The country is in eternal limbo, suspended between everywhere and nowhere. Nowadays, only the biggest tits attract a glimmer of attention. If the newspapers are to be trusted, Croatia appears to be rich with tits. Half the population times two. A bit more than four-million tits, to be precise. One tit per Croat, that is. And that is all one can look forward to till the end of time.