If one could be sure that heaven existed, and that it was the abode of the one on high, one could turn very good, get there in the end, and assault the bastard.

Addendum (January 23, 2017)

Ah, what a joy it would be to approach the one on high ever-so-creepily, bow in front of him with exaggerated devotion, and then spring up to deliver a few fast blows across his puffed-up face! Surprised at first, the bastard would be quick enough in his response and annihilate the brazen assailant, but the joy of those few punches would be worth it still. For all my sins, I can well imagine the assault, as well as the bounce of those thick cheeks of his, but I happen not to believe in the one on high. Not at all. Would that I was as stupid as the bulk of my fellow humans!