It was already light outside when I woke up for the first time this morning, but I immediately realized it was still too early to get up. I struggled to fall asleep again, though. Before I finally managed to doze off, I saw myself in court. Indeed, my next court hearing is in ten days exactly. In limbo, I heard myself struggling with my Croatian. It is perfectly satisfactory when everyday things are concerned, such as ordering food in a restaurant or telling a builder how to fix a crack in a wall, but it is quite inadequate when complex thoughts are needed. Worst of all, I lack most of the concepts I will need in my defense, too. How do I say “freedom of speech” in a country where such a notion is entirely irrelevant, if not also ridiculous? How do I speak of “human rights” in an environment concerned almost exclusively with scratching a living? How do I attack the “political motivations” of my adversary in a country in which politics and theft in all its guises are nearly synonymous? The shady and impassive judge hovering above me all the while, I wanted to speak about the barely concealed political repression written into the slander or libel law whose supposed abuse brought me to court in the first place. How do I argue that my claim that my adversary is involved in a “conflict of interests” cannot possibly be thought of as slanderous or libelous? Between dreams, I was very much aware of Croatia’s political vulnerability in the context of accession to the European Union, as well as the dismal record of its judicial system, but I was stumbling for words in a language I have abandoned for English some forty years ago. I did eventually manage to fall asleep again, but the oppressive sight of the courtroom popped back into my mind as soon as I opened my eyes again. How do I bring up “concealed political repression” in a country obsessed with soccer, singers with big tits, and roast lamb?