Forget about economics and its relentless fumbling, I scold myself. Forget about the ravages of climate change and environmental degradation. Forget about the human species and its untold foibles, I keep scolding myself. Forget about migrant hordes at the proverbial gates. Forget about this tottering civilization, I scold myself over and over again. But I still check the news from day to day, and without fail. I still read books that make me angry with myself. I still do my best to understand everything there is to understand around me. I am not yet able to withdraw from this horrible world. I am not yet able to laugh at it all with utter abandon. As well as cheer. I am not yet able to plunge inward, inward. Forever inward. No matter how much I scold myself, though, I keep glancing outward. Peeking outward like a fool. And so I scold myself ever more vociferously. Ever more anxiously. I scold myself to high heaven. As though scolding myself is the only way to reach liberation. Absorption. Oblivion. You name it.

Addendum I (January 13, 2017)

In retrospect, scolding myself has helped a great deal on my way to liberation early last year. Although it has taken me quite a few years to forget about all the silly stuff I used to think and write about, I am a pro at it by now. I still check the news every now and then, but I do not pay it more than cursory attention. And I forget about it soon afterwards. Economics and geopolitics are history by now. And so are climate change and migrations. The news gives me a feeling of recent developments, and that is that. I give it no further thought, let alone write about it. And the less I think, the less I write, as well. Liberation in a nutshell.

Addendum II (May 18, 2020)

This piece made me smile when I chanced upon it on one of my uncharted journeys through my writings. And I immediately recalled my piece summing up my experience with liberation (“On Liberation,” October 4, 2017). First, abandon all fears and desires. Next, abandon all hope for the human species. And last, abandon thought at will and for as long as you wish. Although these pithy instructions now strike me as both plausible and approachable, they have taken years upon years of scolding myself. And in earnest. Looking back, liberation took many a twist and turn. As well as much confusion along the way. Whence that unexpected smile, it goes without saying. Compassion incarnate, as it were.