My psoriasis, if that is what it is, is getting the better of me lately. Now I have a profusion of red patches all over my body. They appeared first on both thighs close to the groin, then they spread to my arms between elbows and shoulders, and lastly they sprouted on both of my cheeks. The last decade or so, I have had large but not very prominent red patches on my cheeks and in the middle of my forehead during the cold months, but now I look like a leper in the middle of spring. For the first time, people are asking me what is wrong with me. They also tell me about similar things they have had themselves, although they usually talk about allergy. I think it is psoriasis, but I cannot be sure about it. Besides, it could be several conditions on top of each other. What could be the cause, though?

The first thing that comes to my mind is the weather. It has been unseasonably cold the last few weeks. I have been freezing from day to day. My psoriasis is most active during the winter, but it subsides in the spring. This spring has been lousy, though. I do not remember freezing so much ever since my move from Britain to Istria. I would have expected that the Mediterranean climate would suit me fine, but it has been all over the place the last few years. And ever more so, as well.

Next, I am quite aware of the connection between my psoriasis and misery foisted upon me by Slobodan Vugrinec, the former mayor of Motovun. Dealing with Croatian courts has not been good for my health. Every visit to the Municipal Court in Pazin in 2009 and 2010 caused a new outbreak of psoriasis. I have no idea how the court misery could trigger an outbreak of this sort, but I am convinced there must be a connection between the two. In fact, my psoriasis has not bugged me very much at all before the court proceedings. At any rate, my case against Croatia and its courts is about to be sent to Strasbourg. Working on the case with my lawyer the last few weeks only contributed to the psoriasis outbreak, I reckon.

The misery with Sebastijan Vojvoda and his mind-boggling plagiarism has had a similar effect on me. In this case, it was me who threatened him with the court, but I had no idea what else I could do under the baffling circumstances. Vojvoda insists he has plagiarized nothing of mine, at least not consciously, but I cannot explain so many identical paintings in any other way. At least thirteen of them, as a matter of fact. One way or another, Vugrinec and Vojvoda are close together in my mind. People like the two of them I have met never before my move to Istria.

Last, as I already mentioned, it could be allergy, indeed. I spent quite a bit of time in my garden yesterday, where I was exterminating the weeds around the three fig trees I planted last year. In the process, I got many a bloody scrape from the dog rose, which is one of the most persistent weeds in my garden. Even though I cannot be sure about such things, it is possible that I am also suffering from an allergy of some kind. Everywhere I go today, people notice the red blotches on my face, and many of them suggest an allergic reaction. When I mention my garden, they all nod with quite a bit of assurance. Be that as it may, the possibility cannot be dismissed out of hand.

Unsure of the most appropriate remedy, I am trying all of them that come to my mind. I use several kinds of skin cream, chamomile tea, and Aloe Vela gel, a tube of which I happen to have found in my bathroom. I also expose my face to the sun, which is quite pleasing at long last. So far, nothing seems to help. I still look like a leper. Actually, the red blotches on my face are ever more pronounced. I do not mind my looks as much as I mind having to explain to everyone I meet what could be the matter with me. More often than not, I accept the allergy hypothesis without much resistance. Luckily for them, most people I talk to have no experience with psoriasis. But I never mention either Vugrinec or Vojvoda, for it would take me quite a bit of time to explain the connection. Chances are I would only be wasting my time, anyway.

Addendum I (May 30, 2015)

As soon as Ana Kalčić, our nurse, spotted me on the lower square, she pointed at my face and frowned: “What’s that?” I started with psoriasis, which I inherited from my father, but then I mentioned that it could be an allergy, as well as a recent one. “I spent an hour or so fighting with weeds in my garden yesterday morning,” I added. “It’s not psoriasis,” Ana squinted at me and waved her hand with conviction. “It’s an allergy for sure!” I just raised my eyebrows without a word. “Thanks!” I said cheerfully when we parted soon afterwards. For some reason, allergy struck me as a much more attractive option than psoriasis. The red patches appeared overnight, as well. Besides, our nurse has many years of experience with quite a number of patients from Motovun and the surrounding villages. I can only hope that her off-hand diagnosis is right on the mark and I will look like a leper for a few days only.

Addendum II (May 31, 2015)

The red blotches on my face are much less visible a couple of days later, and especially in the morning, but all the others on my body are still there, and in full bloom. Thus it appears that the spread of blotches was indeed a combination of allergy and psoriasis. Luckily, my face appears to have been spared from psoriasis. And the allergy did not last very long, either. But the future is not bright. As I get longer in the tooth, and as my immune system gets progressively weaker, all sorts of ailments will be coming my way, including a wide variety of skin troubles. My psoriasis will become ever more visible, no doubt. Allergies of all sorts will also clobber me at an increasing rate. Climate change cannot but contribute to my infirmities, and especially as it gets more and more dramatic. Miseries like those foisted upon me by Slobodan Vugrinec and Sebastijan Vojvoda, not to mention Renata Vrtarić a year or so ago, will only contribute to my declining health. Not to worry, though. Even lepers can reach enlightenment, as well as enjoy it to the hilt till their last breath.