The latest Webometrics ranking of more than twenty-thousand universities around the globe is in the news in Croatia. The top universities in the world are Harvard, MIT, and Stanford, in that order. As far as Europe is concerned, Oxford is thirteenth and Cambridge is fourteenth in the ranking. Other European universities are far behind. The placement of Croatian universities is quite pitiful by comparison. Zagreb is 458th, Rijeka 1528th, Split 1571th, and Osijek 1828th. Wow! Pitiful, indeed. By comparison, again, Ljubljana is 216th and Belgrade is 431st. Looking at the ranking, I cannot but wonder whether my colleagues from former Yugoslavia can ever understand me and my academic career. With both Harvard and MIT behind me, I must be totally incomprehensible to them all. Another planet, as it were. Woof-woof. Meow-meow. Chirp-chirp.