COMPLETE AND TOTAL IRRELEVANCE (June 30, 2009)

Last night I spent an hour or so talking about my life with my beloved. She just listened to my ravings. I talked about Motovun and the emerging political quagmire there, as well as on the movers and shakers in Pula and Zagreb who are actually behind the local turmoil. I talked about the political irrelevance of my green connections on the peninsula, the Croatian capital, and across the land. I talked about the crooked Istrian and Croatian politics in general and the impossibility of changing anything crucial in the region or the country any time soon. The details of my ruminations are not important, though.  What is important is their eventual conclusion. “The main problem I am facing at the moment,” I admitted at last, “is that I realize that all this is a waste of my time, for Istria as a region and Croatia as a whole are of no importance whatsoever in the world we live in.”  My own life in Motovun and Zagreb is something else, of course, as is our life together in both places, but battling with the Istrian and Croatian context of my daily round is something I must abandon as soon as possible. “Complete and total irrelevance,” I kept repeating as if to myself. My beloved kept listening to the bitter end. One way or another, this morning I feel much, much better.